clearing the air: setting things straight about school

So it’s been brought to my attention that apparently some people are misinterpreting what’s been going on with my school situation.

As I last wrote, I was asked to take a break from school. The exact phrase I used, “asked to leave” was a bit harsh on my part. In meeting with the school director, it was suggested that I take a break from school to earn some money, with the intentions that I return once I’m able to pay for school again. From my side it was a very strong suggestion.

I was told that maybe my life was interfering too much and that it’d probably be a really good idea for me to take some time off. While I was not forced to leave, from my side of things, I didn’t see many options. With my school work load, attempting to balance a job plus school doesn’t seem feasible. My work will suffer on both sides. So, it’s sort of been school or job, not school and job. And really, this is the best attitude for me to take as any less commitment has resulted in subpar design work. And I’m not okay with that.

So. I’m sorry if it sounded like I was blaming the school or implied I was being forced out. This has been extremely emotionally vexing on me. (Frankly, I’m really done with this whole “hot mess” crying all the time business. It’s getting old.) But leaving school is not my first choice. Financially, I just don’t see any other way–I mean, if you know a school that’d let me stay without having a way to pay for tuition, let me know.

I’m in, by no means, upset or angry with the school. I love CPS, and that hasn’t changed. I’m upset with the situation. I’m still trying to view it as an opportunity, but this has all been very hard on me. And trying to get into the mindset that “omg I might start freelancing soon” is still scary to me. I’m extremely sorry if anyone thought I was painting a bad picture of CPS. It was never my intention. This has just been a very hard and very sensitive issue.*

*And just a reminder, I’m a personal blogger. I talk openly about my life. I know there are risks in that. But this is who I am.